Pack my bags

After finding out Trump was elected as our next president, I started to pack my bags so that, as he wishes, I could return to my home country…

Which made me begin to wonder, where the hell do I really come from?? 

Oh right, 

My ancestors were brought here against their wishes, 

And at some point, raped by their ‘owners’ {it hurts to even write that}

That’s the only way I can logically account for my great grandmother’s red hair and white skin,

– I doubt the fairy tailed- ‘our mixed love against the world’ is a greater possibility for how his-story actually went down…

So, again I ask myself, where am I going? 

The muddiness of this answer is found much deeper than at ancestry.com…

Internally I am vexed to point fingers and wage war 

Like, literally go to blows with people who have long gone from this earth, 

But who have left their blood of laws, lies and hate to perpetually speak on their behalf. 

I just want to tell them that we are worthy! 

Shake them up and let them know that we are worthy! 

Slap their faces, look them straight in the eyes and shout to them, “WE ARE WORTHY!” 

Wake them up and while trying to catch my breath, yell at them:

WE! 

ARE! 

WORTHY! 

TOO! 

After all, we were all once strangers on this soil…

God! This feels futile! 

These thoughts and frustrations are exhaustive… 

So, for a moment of peace of mind, I walk away from this reality with my bags half packed, 

Back to my smile…

HOW ABOUT IT?

imageI had a great Fourth of July, with family, friends and strangers. Everything was great, the weather; the food and the  festivities. I’m not sure if this is considered complaining, but through all of today’s goodness, I can’t help but consider the various posts I saw on my social networks stating their ‘discontent’ with ‘Independence Day’ and what it represents. There were statements about slavery, racism, segregation, and the fact that Blacks were not free during Independence Day…etc-The statements are completely valid, so in no way am I downplaying or refuting the truth behind the information stated. What bothers me is that as a Black woman, who lives and has lived in ‘black neighborhoods’ all of my life, I feel like what’s the point of pointing the finger at other races for disparities and stereotypes that we perpetuate?

We sing and dance to music and many of the songs, sung/rapped by black men and women, have verses that are laced by the ‘N’ and ‘B’ words. Hooks, that repeated a degrading view of women and life. I wonder where are the posts that cry out against this type of esteem suicide? Where are the posts demanding better
representation?
We call each other all these crazy names and wonder why other people do it too? We laugh about it and treat it like it’s a cute thing to refer to another woman as ‘my B’.
Why are we demanding an apology from Paula Deen a million years later, but we justify the use of the ‘N’ word among ourselves (although it’s not limited there).
 I can’t blame the ‘white man’ for my brothers that I see grouped on the street corners at seven o’clock in the morning as I’m on my way to work, or for the school drop-out rate, legitimate inmate rate…etc
We as a people know and have been through a lot. And in today’s day and age, I feel like, ignorance is no longer an acceptable excuse. I dare not say that we are all counted as equals because there are numerous injustices that exist, (not only) for the black race, and since that’s the case, why not unify and continue the fight for equality? Some (of course not all) of us are working against our progress and I believe that forward movement continues with us.
They say, ‘charity begins at home’ well, what about it? How can we change our image? I refuse to believe that it’s too late or that we’ve gone too far, but the situation does look pretty bleak. To even speak out in this way is even taken as, being ‘too deep’ or causes one to be looked at as if he or she is crazy.  How can we change our image? What else can we do to get the message across, that we ourselves possess what it takes to clean up the polluted idea of who we are? And it starts with recognizing our role in where we are today. There’s a saying that states, ‘the only person you have the power to change is yourself’. We can’t concern ourselves with what others say about us, more than we do about what we say about ourselves because what we say about ourselves will reflect in our actions-hence the current crisis of our condition.
How about it?

Yes, we can! (November 4, 2008)

Today, the day that may change the world forever,
Voting lines shaped the trail of a desperate demand for change
Early risers, rise with a new energy;
A powerful intent to make that which lies dormant many days of the year- a vote, count today
Some looking pass color lines and gender; selecting hope and empowerment through the suffocating grip of a battered economy and a stifled future
(Many walk to make their difference on this final day)
Not sure what November 5, 2008 will look like, nor what the year 2009 will hold
Still we place our bids confident, yet humbled, in favorable results
So glad to be an American,
Proud of a battered past and grateful for a hopeful future
Tears well up on the inside, praying against corruption and retaliation, from those who reject this change….